A man, has some tests done. And he asked the doctor whats wrong? The doctor says you have leg cancer. Then he says I have some good news and some bad news. The paitent says, alright what's the bad news. The doctor says I have to amputate your leg. The paitent askes, what is the good news? The guy in the bed beside you has an offer on your slippers. LMAO
Grandma and The Wedding/Funeral
One day a man, went to a wedding and sitting next to him was the bride's grandma.After the ceremony, she nudged the man and said "You're next!" The next week the bride died in a car accident, and the man and the Grandma went to the funeral. As they were in line waiting to say their goodbyes, the man nudged the man nudged the Grandma and said, "Just wait, you're next!"
A secretary goes into her bosses office and says, "Excuse me, may I use your dictaphone?"
The boss replies, "No, use your finger like everyone else."
LOL
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